So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
It's my coworker's last day party and I'm the one who ended up shitfaced on the train with half a bottle of belvedere in my bag.
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
He said he was walking down to the White Castle for sliders, still drinking straight from a 750. He came back two hours later pushing a grocery cart that had two puppies in it.
The puppies promptly had the squirts all over the living room, as he had fed them the sliders.
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
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