Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
YOU WILL GIVE ME MASHED POTATOES OR I WILL RIP YOUR SOUL INTO 7 PIECES AND YOU WILL TURN INTO LORD VOLDEMORT
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