he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
So i woke up on a park bench... Using my shoe as a pillow, cuddling a empty handle of vodka... Yet I'm still in my living room. Someone please tell me why all my vodkas gone? I'll deal with the park bench situation at a later time.
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