She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
You love me.
That's because, tragically, I adore whores.
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
He's so vague sometimes. Like dude, we've been friends for 3 years. I don't need you to be vague, I need you to be inside of my vagina.
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
Randomize
