If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
Ha Ha the cop that just pulled me over would like me to tell you hi!
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
in your professional opinion, what's the most elegant way of saying "sorry I spent all night flirting with you, I thought you were gay" ?
Randomize
