my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
What's grosser: using a dirty sex towel as an oven mitt? or using the oven to reheat superbowl bean dip for dinner?
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
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