We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
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