so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
He FaceTimed me fucking his new girlfriend. He was wearing a banana costume.
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
Randomize
