why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
Is there a zoo near here? I need to see some penguins like right now..
I am not bailing you of of jail
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
Randomize
