TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
I projectile vomited into my sink. Jealous?
Kind of. My puke would have just dribbled down my chin and missed the sink completely.
Ohh that happened after I started to cry.
I have been standing totally still for the past 6 minutes because I was convinced my foot was tied to the ground. It turns out it was a string of hair strewn across my foot
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
I didn't know how to commemorate his death, so I snorted a fat line off of his obituary. Rest in peace.
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
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