just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
I'm closer to stabbing a fork in my neck than finishing this resume.
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
Randomize
