After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
She introduced herself as 'Ann the sober one.' Took me to a coat check and a lost and found. Then offered coffee and breakfast sandwiches. Turns out she's been paying her half of the electric bill running post-party operations.
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
You need a new phone. When you talk it sounds like the teacher from Peanuts while she's trying to give a blowjob.
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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