I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
I've been drinking vodka for the last 12 hours at the beach and can't see straight and have awesome hair.
LIFE IS #1 SOMETIMES
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
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