so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
I woke up and went to my kitchen naked and decided I wanted a fruit cup. Ate said fruit cup. Look over and notice my male neighbor is staring at me
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
I look excited, but its just a facade.
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
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