So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
Either these are mashed potatoes in my pants, or I was drunker than I thought.
i asked why he had a giant piece of popcorn duct taped to his head and he said "No, it's actually part of my neck." so no, i didn't fuck him.
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
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