Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
Let's just say that in a last ditch effort to avoid getting arrested I said to the cop "but I'm not even that drunk" and he proceeded to point out (in front of a crowd) that I had "fucking pissed my pants"
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
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