belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
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