I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
That explains waking up with one hand in the toilet and the other in the trash can
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
Nothing says “I spent too much in Vegas” quite like eating a jar of pickles for dinner and planning on cream of celery soup for breakfast tomorrow.
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
Randomize
