Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
I proposed and she said yes man.
You realize the irony of surrendering on independence day, right?
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
Stole my 7th stop sign and 3rd speed limit sign last night. Not even sure how because they were bolted to a cement wall. Tequila gives you strength you didn't know you had.
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
Randomize