His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
Say hello to your nephew Sir Isaac Meriwether van Catsworth
I'm going to have to start taking your phone after ten. That's when all the cat pictures come
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
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