How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
Things I just found under my covers: protein bar, string cheese, vibrator.
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
My bar tender texts me around 5ish and ask what I feel like, so it's ready for me when I get home. All star service.
Dude. You are the LAST person that should live above a bar.
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
Noted. Next time you want to get fried chicken and cocaine.
Ok. That just sounds baller.
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
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