i can't believe i had my finger in that
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
She just started grabbing all the hospital's rubber gloves and face masks and shoving them in her purse, saying, "My tax money paid for these!"
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
You were spooning an empty magnum of white wine in the middle of the bed so I slept on the couch
Well at least there's no more confusion about your place in my life. Wine > pizza > your dick > the rest of you.
Love you...
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
Randomize
