i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
I fucking hate you. Some slutty looking drunk chick backed her ass up across the bar and started grinding on you. You ignored her because you didn't want to share you drink
I care about my drink far more than her feelings
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
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