that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
lets start a swedish sibling band together
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
You puked in the drive thru of Taco Bell. You puked as it was being handed to me. You managed to yell out "FIRE SAUCE" in between hurls.
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
Randomize
