So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
They let me keep the giant cocktail glass because I threw up in it. And made out with the bartender. Europeans are so generous. I'm getting it engraved
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
She kept giving the uber driving directions and we all thought they were wrong so we'd send him the other way. Turns out she wasn't guiding us home, but to the half gallon that she hid in the bushes on the way to the bar.
Randomize
