The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
Tonight was like the Noah's Ark of alcohol. I had to have two of everything.
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
