Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
Randomize
