And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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