you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
I'm done trying to be a vegetarian. My vagina smells like hummus.
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
You called me last night and said you had a vision that a cat made you a sandwich. You were tripping way too hard
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
Randomize
