the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
I just won a riveting game of "who can drink the most vodka out of a hollowed out watermelon". Fucking New Yorkers.
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
Next year, please remind me not to be at a damn Super Bowl party with screaming children whose parents can't control them. I will sell the little suckers to the fucking circus passing through town.
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
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