Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
Randomize
