two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
Dude, I just scraped frozen vomit from my rooftop
I really wish I could say this is a new low for you
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
Randomize
