I think i peed on brittanys purse
Why are there so many empty soda cans in my room?
You put them in a circle around your bed and said it was the best way to ward of the witches from hocus pocus....then you remembered you needed salt too. I'm assuming you havent gone to the bathroom yet.
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
Randomize
