That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
The dog just sneezed and it sounded like a person, after I said bless you I freaked the fuck out and got the gun
He went out to smoke and when he came back I was still in the same spot naked and unable to breathe.
All I could say was, "ladies and gentlemen, THIS is why I drive 30 mins"
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
