Acid is not a monday night drug
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Randomize
