I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
Don't ask me how, but I have a squirrel in my backpack and I don't know what to do with it.
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
Please tell me I was just dreaming when I asked if I could borrow your jesus dildo
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
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