Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
she was so wasted that she tried to tuck me in and read the jokes on the taco bell sauce as a bed time story
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
Wait, like drink with real Phil. Or Phil, the cat that sometimes lived in your closet in Myrtle Beach?
Randomize
