...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
after you took your Demerol you started flying around and talking like the robot ship on the movie Stealth. then you licked my iPhone and declared the mission a success.
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
Dude. I only took a 20 out the ATM last night. How do I have 83 ones?
You stole from the strippers again. I wish I was ninja like you
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
Randomize
