he looks like a really good dad on facebook
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
Celebrating landing my dream job by watching zombie movies and drinking free booze in the bath. I'm like 90% sure I just won life.
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
Randomize
