Where is the hickey?
all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
After I just paid $211 for my hair to be dyed and cut this guy at the bar said "I know you died your hair with koolaid, but I'd still fuck the shit out of you"
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
Last night he asked the cab driver "if you were in the middle of getting tattooed and the tattoo artist suddenly got a boner would you leave or would you get that boner??"
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
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