drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
You know how I said I'd never worry about my roommate? Well I just walked in on her masturbating to Star Trek.
Did she boldly cum where no one has cum before?
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
Randomize