my mouth tastes like poor choices
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
you pushed her into a kiddie pool and knocked out her front teeth... and you still managed to get laid. what. the. fuck.
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
Randomize
