I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
Her four year old daughter walked up to me grabbed my junk and said "this will be in mommy later." Wtf?
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Our livers are going to hate us.
It's okay, they're regenerative. God wanted this.
Randomize
