i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
I awoke this morning alone and naked in my bed I forecast my date later not going so well because I have three giant hickies on my neck there is a note next to my bed that looks a 3rd grader wrote it on my college acceptance letter
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
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