Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
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