you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Dude I left his house at 5:30 a.m. after you peed on his front door and then tried to fight me for my blanket. Don't even do that at my house or I will end you.
hahahahaha. Worst. Text. Ever.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
