OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
My dad is sitting where you rode me
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize
