dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
My roommate has gone Christmas crazy. It looks like Jack Frost came all over my living room. Wanna come fuck me in the fake snow by the fireplace?
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
Randomize
