I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
Being this Hungover on Easter has brought my closer to Jesus... I swear he had to feel shitty like this after coming back from the dead
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
Randomize
