I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
Randomize
